'It’s not my Mom’s fault that she’s an insecure b****': Woman lashes out at future Mother-in-law for taking over her wedding

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    Font - AITA for calling my soon-to- be-MIL an insecure b****? Not the A-hole I, 28F, is getting married on Jan 2, 2023. I'm the eldest and only daughter (I have 3 younger brothers). This is a big deal for my parents and despite our (my fiancé, 27M, whom we'll call D) plan not to ask anything from our parents since we saved for this wedding, my parents insist on giving us money for my wedding. They told me they don't want to see me settling for my "2nd choice" simply because I can't afford my fir
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    Font - I have a big family, so does D. J has a close friend who is so horrible, D is friends with her son but he can't stand her either. She spread horrible stories about me when I started dating D (she almost ruined us) among other things. I told D I won't invite her to our wedding. He agreed. Then we found out J invited her. When we confronted her, she told us it's her right and that she'll be paying the most anyway (again, we didn't accept her offer to give double what my parents gave). I cri
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    Font - We asked J if she wants to come with us for our gowns but she said she'll just buy a ready made dress from a famous designer. I'm very close to my Mom. My Mom always asks for my opinion about her clothes, shoes, etc. so I choose some dress designs and when she approved them, had them custom made. We had our final fitting today and she looks so beautiful I almost cry. J came with us to see D's suit. When she saw my Mom's dress, she told my Mom that it's inappropriate and that she's trying
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    Font - I told her it's not our fault she didn't get a customized dress when we asked her to and we even offered to pay for it and my Mom isn't upstaging me because I choose that dress for her and it's a simple yet elegant dress so it's proper and it's not my Mom's fault that she's an insecure b**** and that if she say another word to my Mom she'll be uninvited. J turned to D but D said he agreed with me and that she's being too much. She left the botique fake hysterical crying.
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    Font - Now I feel bad and I think I should let it go but I can let go disrespect towards me but not towards my loved ones especially my Mom. AITA for not keeping my cool and saying that to my soon-to-be-MIL?
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    Font - Erbureth 20 hr. ago edited 20 hr. ago ΝΤΑ Also tell J's friend that she is not invited, so there isn't any confusion ETA: It's your wedding and the only people that should have a say here are you and D 2.4k Reply Share
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    Font - FrankenBurd2077. 20 hr. ago NTA. But you could have handled the situation a bit better, IMO. It's your wedding. You are paying for it. This means that you get to choose and organise everything. If your MIL doesn't like it, too bad. She can either participate under your conditions, or not participate.
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    Font - Those are literally her choices. This is what she needs to be told, very kindly, yet very directly, and it should come from both you and your fiancé. Kindness is important here though. As badly as she might be behaving, she is still a human being with feelings, as well as the mother of your fiancé, so you'll be dealing with her for a good long while. It's best to keep things cordial while still setting clear boundaries. 350 Reply Share
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    Font - RuReddy4thisJelly. 19 hr. ago ΝΤΑ come at me all you want, I'm a grown s woman come for MY MOM?!? you will regret it 196 Reply Share
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    Font - PsiBlaze 19 hr. ago NTA and stand your ground here, or she'll be a problem forever 135 Reply Share
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    Font - Katana1369 20 hr. ago Certified Proctologist [26] NTA but holidays are going to be challenging dealing with her. Glad your fiance is supporting you in this!
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    Font - dazed1984 20 hr. ago NTA. Although I do think you could have chosen your words better. You shouldn't let it go her inviting people that you don't want there, it's your wedding not hers she has no right whatsoever to dictate any of it to you, if she hasn't got the message already you need to tell her in no uncertain terms.
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    Font - NoJackfruit1651 - 19 hr. ago NTA, but I bet this happened because you were allowing your resentment to boil. Don't let her do this for your wedding. Uninvite that woman that you don't want there. Tell MIL to screw off with her opinions. She's a guest, not the bride. >.<
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    Font - amberlikesowls 19 hr. ago NTA You don't have a MIL you have a Monster In Law. I would uninvite that guest also. I love the way you stood up for yourself. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding.
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    Font - SummerOracle 18 hr. ago NTA, calling her an insecure b**** wasn't the healthiest approach, but your frustration was totally warranted, her behavior was way out of line. Overall it sounds like she's potentially a narcissist.
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    Font - You and your husband need to stop giving her power over your wedding however. You both need to start setting very clear, firm boundaries now, and stop involving her in situations you know she will misbehave in. If she continues lashing out, then you may need to seriously consider uninviting her.

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